Friendship is Like a Flower: Healing Words for Tough Times

For some reason, my 2011 Friendship is Like a Flower post is in my top 10 most popular articles, according to my monthly Google report. I like the poem every bit as much, if not more, now as I did then, and I think today’s unprecedented events warrant a revisit.

Thank you to Regina, for her beautiful words. They are such a wonderful tool for reflection. Join me verse by verse and let me hear your thoughts. I look forward to reading them.

Friendship is like a flower,

Glowing in its glory,

Each and every seed,

Telling its own story.

We get busy with our lives and sometimes only call friends when we need something. It’s nice to make a call to say “hi” and let them know we’re thinking of them. Perhaps send them flowers for a special occasion. Or bring them flowers when you meet up the next time.

As each flower blooms,

And then continues to grow,

More of its strength and knowledge,

Continues to show.

Don’t punish yourself when you make a faux pas. We are all human and make mistakes, and we sometimes repeat our mistakes. Be kind to yourself, take the lesson, learn, and move forward. Trouncing on yourself or someone else doesn’t encourage growth. There will be bumps in life. Otherwise, how will we grow richer without these experiences?

And like a garden,

It blooms much more fair,

When carefully tended,

By those who care.

We connect with people through listening. Listen for the good in people and situations. There is always good. Just as our ears can be tuned to listen for love, hope, and courage, they also can filter out damaging gossip and cruel language. One of the most important habits of a creative thinker is to be a good listener, and habits require practice, especially good habits.

Once in a while,

You come across a friend,

Who is as beautiful as a flower,

With a good heart to lend.

Ears aren’t our only hearing organ. We can listen with our hearts. Try walking a mile in another’s shoes. That’s called practicing empathy. And there’s a shortage of empathy in the world right now; all of us need to practice.

So I picked this flower,

And pulled it apart,

And soon all its pieces,

Grew into my heart.

Can you hear growth? With practice, you can. Be an active listener, ask questions, dig deeper. Every person contributes to others’ growth through words. Are your words fertilizer for the soul or more weed killer? What you say matters.

But when I realized,

Is that this flower that grew,

Was not leaves and petals,

But pieces of you.

Have you been surprised by a friend’s seemingly sudden or rash decision? Could it be more that your listening was less than it should have been? Maybe that decision was in-your-face obvious to everyone else, but your focus was on only on you. (It’s OK. Remember, you’re human.)

Your love and kindness,

Your strength and power,

Have helped me grow,

Into my own little flower.

Paying it forward is a beautiful way to cultivate relationships. What better way to help friends realize their dreams? There’s enough love for all of us to dream big and reap what we sow.

And now with our friendship,

I'll never let go,

And we can help others,

To flower and grow.

Tap into your dreams by listening. Listen to yourself — what does your heart say? What does it long for? Begin answering by noticing your body’s reaction to your thoughts. An involuntary smile is a different response than a clenched jaw. What are those goosebumps telling you — fear or excitement? The best you is communicating inside of you. Make sure you are listening.

Most of us are wondering what we can do to make a difference during this time of the COVID-19 pandemic. The important thing is to know your heart first, then you can open it to others. Be the best you, and sometimes the hardest part of that is accepting your (and everyone else’s) imperfect human condition.

Or in the words of one great man:
“Real strength has to do with helping others.” ~ Mister Rogers


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